Top Amazon releases for Mar. 13th

Get the stuff you want, contribute to Laser Time! I honestly wish it could be more simple, but it just can’t!

Back again with a semi-serious look at the video game and movie releases of the week (as opposed to last week.) As always, clicking through and buying ANYTHING through Amazon gets you what you desire, usually as cheap as humanly possible, earns Laser Time a tiny commission to keep living on. Below you’ll also find a detailed list of upcoming video game pre-orders and bonuses. Oh, and just by COMMENTING ON THIS ARTICLE you can win a free $20 Amazon gift card. All we ask is that you spend here!


The Adventures of Tintin
I know this movie can’t possibly live up to my expectations, but I’m dying to see it anyway. For one, despite all the gripes, I’m still fascinated by the uncanny valley of motion-capture animation. Especially something as ambitious and stylized as this. Secondly, I’ve always had an enormous amount of respect for Tintin The Boy Adventurer, as well as the world’s seemingly unanimous affection for the guy (save America, obviously.) Every time I talk to someone my age from outside the US, they talk about Tintin as if he were Garfield, Transformers, and Indiana Jones all rolled into one. Plus I know that whatever problems I may have with this particular film, I’m positive we’ll see that corrected when Peter Jackson takes the helm of the next movie.


Top Gun: Hardlock  360  |  PS3
What the hell is this?! You can’t just go dropping such a piece of finely chiseled ’80s action nostalgia without telling us what it is?! Where did this come from? Is Val Kilmer involved? What the hell is it? I can only assume by everyone’s radio silence on the matter that it’s unspeakably awesome… right? RIGHT?!

 


Young Adult
After Thank You For Smoking and Up in the Air, it’s pretty safe to say I’m a fan of Jason Reitman, and I’ve been told this little film, which takes the notion of the stubborn little girl who never grew up, then cranks it up to cruel comedic volumes, is right up my alley. Hank accused me of spoiling the film on at least on episode of Laser Time, but to that I say, if it’s a spoiler Hank, then how come I already know it from reading reviews, huh?! HOW COME, HANK?!

Naruto Shippuden Ultimate Storm Generations  360  |  PS3
Back when I used to write for GamesRadar, I was told you guys love to buy Naruto games (so please, won’t you buy through us?) and so I reviewed and previewed approximately 700,000 distinct Naruto games. So while I know not one siongle thing about the title coming out today, my expertise can assure of at least two things.
1. The look of the game is probably authentic to that of the TV show.
2. The game probably updates plot elements and playable characters to reflect the current storyline in the TV show “making for one helluva piece of premium fan service. Boy Howdy!”
MAN I’M GOOD!!!


The Descendants
I haven’t seen this film, but I’m told by everyone who has that it’s soooooooo “overratted.” Whatever! I love Alexander Payne, if only because Election‘s basically one of the greatest movies ever made, so I’m sure the Oscar Buzz wasn’t done solely in an effort to get George Clooney to attend the Academy Awards. He’s always there. Either way, I’ll support it just for earning Community‘s Jim “Dean-aling-aling” Rash an Oscar. Undoubtedly his first of many more to come!


FIFA Street  360  |  PS3
You know, when I say “I hate sports” I suppose I should say “I hate sports with the exception of Soccer (“Footie Balls” to you foreign people) and the Street series.” I’m a pretty huge fan of EA’s arcadey sports franchise and I played soccer pretty competitively throughout the entire first half of my life. Although, I do have a problem with the name, now that I think about it. Given that it’s a sport primarily played by upper class white kids in the suburbs, soccer couldn’t be any less “street” if it came with Apple earbuds and a Vitamin Water.


Silent Hill: Downpour  360  |  PS3
I recently joked with my buddies in the game reviewin’ business that we should just change call the 6 on the 10 point review scale simply “Silent Hill.” As in, “This game scored a Silent Hill out of 10!” If it scores any more or less, well, it just isn’t Silent Hill to me. Whatever, I think that joke was fucking Pulitzer worthy!

 


Yakuza: Dead Souls
Where the hell did this come from? You mean to tell me there’s a new Yakuza game that didn’t take over a year to come out in the US?! Color me shocked… whatever, I’m sure Mikel loves it…

 

 

UPCOMING VIDEO GAME AMAZON BONUSES – Pre-order and support Laser Time

Listed in order of release date

Ninja Gaiden 3  360  |  PS3
-Pre-order for access to a Dead or Alive 5 demo with Ayane vs Hayate
Resident Evil: Operation Raccoon City  360  |  PS3
-Pre-order get the Renegade Weapon Pack
Star Wars Limited Edition Xbox 360 with Kinect
-get Kit Fisto as a playable character in Jedi Destiny mode
Ridge Racer: Unbounded  360  |  PS3
-$10 in-store credit
Kid Icarus: Uprising 
-FREE Original 3D Classics: Kid Icarus 3DS download
-exclusive vehicle DLC pack featuring the RC410 and the Hot Rod pick up truck
Tiger Woods PGA Tour 13  360  | PS3
-$10 in-store credit
EXCLUSIVE Celebrity golfer pack including Hockey legend Jeremy Roenick, Football Hall of Famer Marshall Faulk, Basketball super-star Dwight Howard and Boxing legend Sugar Ray Leonard
The Witcher 2: Assassin of Kings
-Pre-order exclusive Witcher Digital Comic Book
Prototype 2  360  |  PS3
-Pre-order and get upgraded to the Radnet Edition
Tom Clancy’s Ghost Recon: Future Soldier  360  |  PS3
-$10 in-store credit
-EXCLUSIVE Drilling Ship Co-Op Map
Silent Hill: Downpour  360  | PS3
-$10 in-store credit
Spec Ops: The Line  360  |  PS3  |  PC
-$10 in-store credit
Borderlands 2  360  |  PS3  |  PC
-$10 in-store credit

 

15 thoughts on “Top Amazon releases for Mar. 13th

  1. Just ordered a couple new pairs of 3D glasses that I’ve been eyeing for awhile, hopefully that will pass a little into the Laser Time coffers.

  2. I saw the top gun game in a Target and I had NO IDEA where it came from. I was wondering how you guys felt about it. GOD I could use a T’dar right now

    1. its most likely Chris from the style and spelling mistakes lol. Also how bout that link to amazon.ca Chris, any day now and I’ll make you a fortune

  3. Is there anyway you can drop some links to the non-american versions of Amazon? I want to buy some stuff through Amazon.ca in the future. but I still want you guys to make some money

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