The Best New Amazon Releases for July 3rd – Fanboy Edition

See the week’s new releases, upcoming game deals, support your pals at Laser Time and win a $20 Amazon gift card!

Wow… It’s an incredibly scant release week, but we’re gonna give away a $20 Amazon gift card anyway! Below you’ll find a list of newly released games and movies, as well as a detailed list of upcoming video games with nifty pre-order bonuses and a list of comics recommended by Cape Crisis. If you’re not going to Donate to Laser Time (last week for a free keychain!) or buy yourself a snazzy t-shirt, the least you could do is shop Amazon through our links. Even if you don’t want the items highlighted below or on the right hand sidebar, clicking through our links into Amazon costs you nothing it kicks Laser Time the tiniest of commissions to help keep the show free. Simple and clean. Again, there’s not a whole lot of new stuff to pick through this week, so to compensate for the lack of items, I tried to make up for it with some HARDCORE DISNEY NERDERY! Either way, one lucky commenter will win his or herself a shiny $20 Amazon gift card. Happy shopping, folks!

Theatryhthm: Final Fantasy
Proving once again that they hate Google and store shelf alphabetization, Square releases a virtually unspellable title while burying its lead. I kid the game’s title! This could very well be the first physical 3DS game I buy in 2012 (Pushmo 4 life!) It’s not that there hasn’t been a some quality on Nintendo’s troubled handheld, it’s more so that the set-in-stone $40 price point hasn’t motivated me pick up anything after the glorious Super Mario 3D Land. But this? This I can get behind! It’s not a port of a console game, the touch-based rhythm action is perfectly suited for portable play, and most importantly, it’s a joyous, comprehensive piece of fan service for Final Fantasy lovers, who, let’s face it, are used to paying a premium. The game features songs, characters, and cutscenes from FF 1-13, and the fact that Japan has already gotten additional DLC might very well also make it the first game that I’ve purchased DLC for on a Nintendo console. These are truly exciting times!

God Bless America
I checked this out when it debuted On Demand (concurrent to its theatrical release) and I enjoyed it quite a bit. This always feel weird to say out loud… but here goes: As a director, Bobcat Goldthwait has one of the best track records in the buisness. No, seriously! Shakes the Clown, Windy City Heat, World’s Greatest Dad – these are all tremendously memorable, transcendentally dark comedies I absolutely encourage everyone to check out. (And yes, I unapologetically love Hot to Trot.) Bobcat’s jokingly called this a “liberal snuff film,” as it’s about a nice man pushed to ritualistically (hilariously?!) murdering Fox News pundits, spoiled teenage reality show stars, and anyone else making the world a meaner place. I didn’t love it anywhere near as much as the aforementioned films, however, Goldthwait has once again created something pitch black and unforgettable.

The Secret World
Is this finally seeing the light of day?! I swear, every goddamned week, it’s listed below on the “Upcoming Pre-Order Bonus” list as coming out “next week.” I promise that list is being updated, it’s Secret World that’s had the problem of seeing the light of day. Such is the case with many games in its genre though, so I’ll readily accept the game’s delays, since I’ve never been this interested in an MMO… well, ever? Part of the reason I can never get into MMOs is that I’m just not that into Fantasy. (Give me lasers and rifles over swords and wizards any day of the week!) But this thing is set in a more familiar, modern time, and instead of ancient runes and magic, it’s world is one where ever myth, urban legend and conspiracy theory is actually true! Once you get me imaging a bunch of Sasquatches battling the Illuminati, I suppose you could say I’m officially interested.

Treasure Planet
Wow, has it really been TEN YEARS already?! An entire decade since… oh, who am I kidding? I’ll bet none of you have seen this goddamned movie. Which, while understandable, is sort of a shame. Disney’s re-imagining of Robert Louis Stevenson’s Treasure Island is a nice visual spectacle, albeit somewhat “Disneyfied” and formulaic. I can see why it’s been forgotten, but of all the films made during this forgettable period of Disney animation (See Brother Bear, Atlantis, and below) this is probably the best. And if I may go off on a tangent here, the film is pretty great evidence of why exactly The House of Mouse ended up buying up Marvel. Remember: Disney used to be Pixar. They didn’t make safe films for children, they made films for everyone. And during this rocky period in the company’s history, none of their animated fare were doing very well, let alone laying any foundation for future fandom, beyond the youngest of the young and little girls. This, and Atlantis, were costly long-in-development projects meant to capture the adventurous hearts of “The Boys” (and adults.) Unfortunately, they way overestimated the desire for both, by simultaneously mounting related TV shows, merchandise, video games and straight-to-video sequels for movies that would go on to outright bomb, lead to an enormous failure that took years to recover from. So when it came time to get the young males’ attention a decade later, what do they do? Fuck it, buy Marvel!

Home on the Range
Hello there, ONLY DISNEY ANIMATED MOVIE I’VE NEVER SEEN! I feel guilty for the gap in my Disney knowledge, but hey, it’s pretty much the most forgotten of the studio’s tentpole releases. Alas, the star power of Roseanne Barr and Cuba Gooding Jr. couldn’t save this poor film, and the failure of Disney’s “44th Animated Film” created the longest gap in its 2D theatrical output since the company started making animated movies, starting with Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs, in 1937! Technically, it’s not the last 2D animated movie, thanks to a valiant, but somewhat unsuccessful return-to-roots with The Princess and the Frog. However, it is the absolute last Disney film to be made using traditional cel animation (i.e. pointing an IRL camera at drawings) and for that alone I think it’s a worthy footnote worth owning for animated collectors like myself.


UPCOMING VIDEO GAME AMAZON BONUSES – Pre-order and support Laser Time

Listed in order of release date

Gravity Rush 
-FREE Military Costume DLC with pre-order
-FREE 4 Extra Missions, which include 2 Side Missions and 2 Challenge Missions
NCAA Football 13  
-Free Nike Pro Combat premium uniform pack – Amazon exclusive
Silent Hill: Downpour  360  | PS3
$10 in-store credit
Theatrhythm: Final Fantasy
-FREE gripped stylus and 17 stickers with pre-order
Kingdom Hearts 3D Dream Drop Distance 
-FREE AR cards that unlock exclusive in-game Dream Eater with pre-order
Persona 4 Arena  *NEW*
-FREE Persona 4 Arena Arranged Soundtrack based on the music of Shoji Meguro
The Last Story   *NEW*
-Pre-order and receive a 44-page softcover Art Book in a special custom case
Sleeping Dogs  360  |  PS3
-FREE Martial Arts Pack, with Shaolin Showdown mission, Shaolin Warrior outfit (with increased striking damage), Bonus Triad XP points, and Wing Chun decoration for your safe house with pre-order
Madden 13
-Free  Andrew Luck Future Stars Draft Pick Madden Ultimate Team Card for immediate use in Madden 12
Far Cry 3  360  |  PS3  *NEW*
-Pre-order and receive Amazon-exclusive Warrior Pack.
Tekken Tag Tournament 2  360  |  PS3  *NEW*
-Pre-order for early access to two DLC characters, Angel and Michelle Chang plus the bonus Snoop Dogg stage
Transformers: Fall of Cybertron  360  |  PS3  *NEW*
-Pre-order for Bruticus (G2) to use in Single Player mode
Borderlands 2  360  |  PS3  |  PC
-$10 in-store credit
Dead or Alive 5  360  |  PS3  *NEW*
-Pre-order for a set of three ‘DOA Devils’ black bunny swimsuits for Christie, Tina, and Ayane
NBA 2K13  360  |  PS3  *NEW*
-Pre-order for access to NBA All Star Game content including the Sprite Slam Dunk Contest, Three Point Contest, Rising Stars Challenge Game, and the NBA All Star Game
Dishonored  360  |  PS3  *NEW*
-Pre-Order for exclusive Backstreet Butcher Pack which includes Bone Charm bonuses for Fencer, Fire Water, and Blast Resistant plus an in-game Wolfhound Statue
Resident Evil 6  360  |  PS3
-Pre-order for FREE Exclusive Mercenaries stage – The High Seas Fortress 
Assassin’s Creed III  360  |  PS3  
-EXCLUSIVE: FREE Steelbook Case upgrade with art by Alex Ross
Hitman: Absolution  360  |  PS3  
-FREE Bartoli Custom Pistol, with built-in, high-spec sight and silencer to give excellent accuracy and an extremely high rate of fire with pre-order






74 thoughts on “The Best New Amazon Releases for July 3rd – Fanboy Edition

  1. As a fanboy of Final Fantasy and a huge fan of Elite Beat Agents, I can not wait for Theatryhthm.

    Also. don’t feel bad about not seeing Home on the Range Chris. I saw it in theaters and it wasn’t anything too spectacular.

  2. Nice release list roundup!
    I’ll have to admit to never having seen any of those Bobcat Goldthwait movies. I intend to correct that in the near future.

  3. God Bless America was a great dark comedy, even if it falls apart towards the end, can’t recommend it enough. Definitely worth a on demand viewing.

  4. I’d be disappointed that square hasn’t made a decent FF game in years, if I didn’t play Dragon Quest instead.

    1. I guess we’ll never know. Us Canadians will probably just have to donate/buy stuff to support them… unless of course we get an actual answer lol.

  5. I really want to check out God Bless America because of my dislike for everything in that film, i.e. Fox News pundits and reality TV shows stars.

    Plus, World’s Greatest Dad was one of darkest “dark comedy” I’ve seen and it was absolutely hilarious.

  6. Wow, I don’t remember Treasure Planet or Home on the Range at all. Weird. I’m usually pretty good about at least remembering movies. I must not have been paying much attention at the time. Oh well. Laser Time FTW!

  7. That’s a pretty crappy release week. With the holiday I’ll probably spend till farming panties from CNRR dlc in Borderlands instead. Gotta see what’s in the PSN store update, maybe get a card from amazon.

  8. I really liked World’s Greatest Dad, so I kinda want to see God Bless America. The trailers looked pretty interesting. Otherwise, a pretty light week for releases.

  9. Next couple of weeks look scant for new release, though Will Ferrell’s “Casa de Mi Padre” (7/17) looks interesting.

  10. I did not like “Treasure Planet” and I have never seen “Home on the Range” but man I really liked “Atlantis”. The art style was sharp with some really strong lines if I remember correctly it has been a few years. Some of the action scenes get pretty intense and the death of the villain is offscreen but violent, plus Micheal J Fox.

  11. I agree about the Secret World. I’m angry at myself for getting so interested in an MMO when I’ll be entering college this fall and will have no chance of being able to afford it.

  12. God Bless America sounds really intriguing. I haven’t seen any of Goldthwait’s directorial work.. you’ve given me a lot to catch up on. =-)

  13. I need more money so I can help Laser Time more! I’ve donated, bought a shirt, got a comic through the link, and ordered some Simpsons DVD’s through the Amazon links but that’s not nearly enough considering all the amazing hours of entertainment the Laser Time network provides me!

  14. I must have theatrythim. I loved elite beat agents and the final fantasy series so this will hit the right mark for me.

  15. Due to the relatively slow game release week, I’ll continue to beat the heat and continue playing some SSX.

  16. Goddamn international shipping rates. I refuse to pay $7.99 for shipping on MadWorld! I can kick a hobo in the face and he’ll drop that game. Guaranteed.

  17. There are so many good games coming out between now and Fall…it seems like every E3 I walk away not too hyped for anything, but by the time Winter is here, I have a laundry list of stuff I want.

  18. Think I’d like Theatryhthm since I’ve put hundreds of hours into Dissidia, but I don’t have a 3DS…

  19. I really want to play far cry 3. If I win, I will double the prize and speend it through the links.

  20. Man, I’ve gotta jump on that new final fantasy game. I’ve got the rythem! Do you have they rhyme? Come on laser time, its final fantasy time.

  21. I’ve always liked Treasure Planet. It might be interesting to see how the jump to blu-ray went. I always feel less guilty for unwarranted impulse buys if they support Laser Time even in the smallest way.

  22. For whatever reason I get Treasure Planet and Titan A.E mixed up a lot. (and by a lot I mean the one time every two years that I actually hear either of those names…)

  23. Theatrythmjhggyuuh (WTF?) looks pretty interesting. I adore the FF soundtracks, and I want some new games for my 3DS, but damn those sprites look creepy…

  24. man i still have half of those old disney movies on VHS and still watch them my favorite is the hunchback of notredam.

  25. Is it okay if I go off book and buy something not on your Amazon recommendation list? I’m likely gonna buy RockNRolla,

  26. I have a pretty big Disney backlog of things I need to watch. Sadly, Home on The Range isn’t one of them.

    Treasure Planet was pretty good for what it was although I think my opinion is colored by exactly how much I enjoy David Hyde Pierce.

  27. Not that much released this week…but that’s ok, gotta save up for more graphic novels and comics.

  28. Loving the new 3DS stuff, I can’t wait to cave in and finally get one when the 3DS XL comes. I’m most excited for Kingdom Hearts 3D, but Theaterhythm looks awesome too, I’d better start saving. If I can, I’ll order it all through Laser Time too!

  29. i didn’t get to be a contestant on the quiz show but im still hoping for that 20$ to buy 85% worth of goods through laser time!

  30. I thought god bless america was a Documentary about how shitty america is, but that sounds awesome! no time left to finish this comment i must go get it

  31. When does Persona 4 Area even come out? Because I will totally throw down on a pre-order for some of that sweet, sweet music.

  32. Hey, does the site get money in it’s pocket if I used amazon gift credit to buy stuff through the links? Because I did that.

  33. I remember liking the first part of Atlantis a lot, the half where they actually get to Atlantis was fucking boring though.
    Maybe it was just because I really liked the machinery designs…

  34. SOOO UHHHHH…..Treasure Planet’s main character, Jim, is voiced by Joseph Gordon-Levitt.

    I’m uhhh, just gonna leave that there.

  35. I thought that Theatryhthm game was some freemium iPhone game but it’s a 40 buck 3DS cart hahahahahahaha

  36. I don’t think I’ve read anything about the 3D in Theatrhythm. Why isn’t it just on DS, then, which I have?

    The movies directed by Bobcat are pretty damn good, and certainly not your usual crap. I haven’t seen God Bless America yet, but I’m looking forward to Netflix sending it my way.

  37. Oooh, The Secret World looked pretty sweet at PAX East. Might have to get that one. And God Bless America. Bobcat Goldthwait was on Real Time with Bill Maher and made that movie sound badass.

  38. Arrgh, I want Theatrhythm so bad, but Square Enix had to go and have two major 3DS releases in the same month… (three, actually, but I don’t care about Heroes of Ruin) I want to conserve my money, so I’m waiting eagerly like a small child for Christmas for Kingdom Hearts: Dream Drop Distance. God, I cannot wait for that game… The demo was amazing!

    I definitely plan on checking out Theatrhythm at some point, though.

  39. I remember being impressed with Treasure planet when I first saw it. I am really interested in sleeping dogs. I am not sure if it is just for the history or the fact that I love martial arts.

  40. Gift card or not, thanks for informing me that Treasure Planet came out on blu-ray. Insta-buy for me. I may be in the minority, but it’s honestly one of my favorite Disney movies of all time.


    OH BOY

    seriously whenever i saw that movie through to the end and got to the song i was like DAYUM I REALLY LIKE THIS SONG

  42. I totally enjoyed Treasure Planet and really love it’s odd 3d rendered backgrounds. Sad that didn’t do so well for them and HOLY SHIT TEN YEARS! Damn i’m getting old feeling but yeah that was a good flick for sure.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.