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After practically despising The Darjeeling Limited, Was Anderson once again won me over with Moonrise Kingdom. Whereas the former seemed like a sophomoric self parody of his style (ridiculous scenarios, straightfaced characters, and classic rock) Moonrise totally clicked for me in very warm and Rushmore way. Funny, heartwarming, original and features characters with a little more depth than the upper class male woes displayed in previous films.
Medal of Honor: Warfighter 360 | PS3
WARFIGHTER: It’s not just a state of mind, it’s a genre! Jesus, what a stupid name. Sounds like something my dad would call Call of Duty. (“You should really go outside and put down that there War Fighter, son…” “Fuck you, Dad!”) Speaking of which, if you ever needed more proof that Call of Duty (pre-order through us, yo!) was one of the biggest things ever, the Medal of Honor resurrection shows that there’s a giant pile of money to be made just by being mistaken for it.
Mad Men Season Five
Ho boy, I do love me some Mad Men. I’ve never bothered to watch the show on TV, so the wait for S5 on DVD has been nothing less than agonizing. I’ve heard people call the show boring, but those people are wrong! Mad Men is unflinching, brutal, and above all, honest. I rarely find myself thinking “Man, look how different things were back then!” and instead get repeatedly blown away by how little has actually changed between now and then. There’s just a lot less we say out loud. Of course, it doesn’t hurt that I’ve worked in an industry for over half a decade that begs for consumer attention…
Looney Tunes Platinum Collection Volume 2
YES!!!! These sets are nothing short of Masterpieces! Not sure why Disney refuses to get in the act, but Warner Bros has fully embraced the legacy of the animated shorts that made them famous by releasing consistent, feature-soaked collections of wonderfully restored animation from the pioneers who defined the medium. Not only are these classic toons presented 100% uncensored (Racism, guns, Hitler) they even do their best to restore original openings and title sequences so as to appear the way they were originally presented theatrically. (Hey, a lot of Looney fans don’t even realize we’ve been seeing made-for-TV syndication credits and edits for over five decades!) Cartoon fans complained that the last set contained too many shorts previously released on the Golden Collection DVDs (Get ’em while they remain in print!) Volume 2 has even more new-to-DVD toons, but for me, it’s enough to have them remastered in 1080p!
Fuck, I love this movie, but Christ is it terrible. Cynical parodies of stupid musicals and/or Disney pap are pretty much directly referencing Pete’s Dragon, and this movie had the balls to try and introduce the phrase “Brazzle Dazzle into the lexicon. But I fucking love it – I can’t help it! I gotta major soft sport for Disney dragons. Maleficent at the end of Sleeping Beauty, Epcot’s Figment, etc., and Elliot is no exception.
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
Having seen Night Watch and Wanted, by all accounts, Timor Bekmambetov should’ve been one the world’s more notable visual action directors. But this looked too fucking stupid. Or at least the marketing did, taking a tongue in cheek idea and presenting it as wholly serious. Didn’t like the looks of this one. Hopefully, I’m wrong.
I’m not even entirely sure what this is, but I’m already glad it exists. This is Forza’s attempt at making a more accessible racing game, one to be enjoyed by gamers beyond that of fans of hardcore car porn. Forza Motorsport was already an infinitely more fun and accessible game than other “racing simulators” and it didn’t do itself any favors by struggling to keep up with, or appear like Gran Turismo. It took only took the release of GT5 show them.
Star Wars: The Clone Wars – Season Four
Damn, four seasons in already?! Never in my life did I think I’d be this behind in anything related to Star Wars, much less, have no desire to catch up. But hey, this show’s been on for a while. It must have its fans and/or gotten better, right? Admittedly, I was turned off by the reviews when Lucas decided to string the first three episodes into a theatrical release. Again, I’d be more than happy to be dead wrong about this show.
Ah, the Holy Trilogy of Shooters! Of course, I’m just going on the messianic status bestowed on it by internet fanboys, I haven’t played any entry in the series for more than a couple hours. Only $39.99
I have no idea what this is, but I know the people love James Bond
LESS THAN NEW
C’mon, you thnk we weren’t gonna bring this up?! And to that end, are there any of you left who haven’t bought it already? Well, if ya haven’t, be sure to do through your pals at Laser Time wontcha?! I mean, seriously, if you recall our collective enthusiasm, has there ever really been a movie we’ve all been this excited for? Has there ever been a movie that paid back that enthusiasm a billion fold? I certainly can’t remember one… Either way the movie’s looks great on Blu… even though I will say that the darkish first act looks a helluva lot more green screeny in High Def. On the literal bright side, however, it really makes the spectacular final battle pop by comparison, with all the comicy theatrics taking place outdoors in broad daylight. You’ve got numerous versions of the movie to choose from, just do your research on that Marvel Universe 10-Disc Phase One set, which has apparently been delayed indefinitely, so shop at your own risk, True Believers!
Never heard of it.
E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial – Anniversary Edition
Oh my dear CHRIST! How good is this goddamned movie. And how rad is that Spielberg completely redacted his own 2002 redux and completely restoring his original cut straight from the original negative. Shotguns and all! Not only does that Lucas-esque nerfening not even appear on this disc, it’s been replaced by a bevy of new bonus features in honor of E.T.’s 30th Anniversary. Yes, that makes us feel old, but that’s largely due to the fact that this film holds up so goddamned well, being so worth rewatching, and makes everyone feel the exact same age when viewing it. The childhood dream of meeting your own personal alien mixed with the outright terror of having a heavily armed government raid your house! All of these were possibilities when I was a kid, so the film clicked for me on every level.
Indiana Jones: The Complete Adventures [BLU-RAY!]
Why not?! The Krystal Skull pretty much soured my desire to rewatch Indy for some time, but I know full well I’m in the wrong on that. I’m powerless to resist damn near any “home video” release of anything from Lucasfilm, so why the fuck would three stellar Indy films be any different?! I hear Raiders gets a better transfer than the other films… can anyone corroborate?
Dark Knight Returns Part 1
The dared to do it, and it is done! Almost… the first part at least. Those brilliant tooners at DC Animation have brought to life one of the most compelling Bat stories by former visionary and current lunatic, Frank Miller. I’ve actually been too terrified to check this out. Every other story adapted into a direct-to-DVD picture thus far has been a story I’m either vaguely familiar with or don’t care to read. This I know, and the thought of it sucking makes me queasy, quite frankly.
James Bond 50
BEHOLD: The greatest franchise ever formed! Jesus, is Bond really 50. That would make OG James, Sean Connery, at this point… well, dead right?
Had the good fortune to see this on a plane recently. And by good fortune, I mean I didnt have to pay for it, and I didn’t feel guilty for falling asleep. The movie started out none too bad, or at least far better than those insipid trailers would have you believe. Unfortuantely, it’s worse than the bad comedy the marketing portrayed it as, but a horseshit Hollywood cliche, and further proof Tim Burton should be stopped before reimagining anything else.
Cinderella: Diamond Edition
Fucks sake, this disc is great. The thing looks gorgeous, and no matter how much of “A Man” you consider yourself, Cinderella is still Disney storytelling firing on all cylinders. One of my favorite parts about these newly consistent Disney Blus, outside of the painstakingly gorgeous transfer, is that the include a ton of new HD bonus supplements and still include all the content on the old discs. You don’t have to feel bad about throwing them out!
The Princess Bride: 25th Anniversary Edition
If you don’t like this picture, well, fuck you. Quite possibly the greatest thing ever with the word “Princess” in the title. There’s a damned good reason it’s so Universally beloved. Hey, which Princess Bride cast member do you think’s gonna die next. Every one of these dudes looks 1000 years old at this point. The easy money’s on Rob Reiner, but I’m gonna say Mandy Patinkin. That dude’s to lovable to not have some potentially lethal scandal hanging over his head…
Universal Classic Monsters: The Essential Collection
Words can’t express how much the Universal monsters mean to me. These films from the 30s and 40s still aired on TV while I was a kid, and these famous geeks were referenced everywhere for years. Bugs Bunny met them. Scooby Doo met them, and a ton of other 80s cartoons met up with The Mummy, Wolfman and Drac, because hey, they were fucking timeless for almost a century. Their Universal Legosi, Karloff, and Chaney versions specifically. Sadly, I feel that’s no longer the case anymore, but that could perhaps be due to the fact that my adult attention is stupidly focused more on shit like True Blood and Twilight than modern cartoons.
Masters of the Universe: 25th Anniversary Collection
The worst movie you absolutely MUST own on Blu-ray! Why is He-Man not in the title? Because Prince Adam is hardly in the damned thing. It seems Dolph Lundgren looked so much like the dude, nobody cared if he spoke English, so he doesn’t talk all that much. The same treatment is given to damn near every other horrible excuse for an action figure, and come to think of it, Eternia as a whole, too! The film takes place mostly at a “present day” (1987) mall. If you read one word of anything I just said, I can’t imagine you’re not convinced.
Dishonored 360 | PS3
Initially, I thought this looked like a too-little-too-late Assassin’s Creed ripoff, but my ignorance has been thrown back in my face on numerous occasions as of late. It’s evidently from a pedigree of visionary devs, and pretty damn righteous according to the reviews. Live and learn…
When I say “fuck this movie” I mean that I thoroughly recommend watching the shit out of it.I had a blast watching it, but no less than two minutes after of walking out of the theater and talking about it with a buddy it completely fell apart to scrutiny. “What a minute… that made no fucking sense!” was a phrase spoken a lot, if I recall. But seriously, a well made, gorgeous movie that’s thoroughly interesting to watch, but… It’s not bad, just stupid. However, it will undoubtedly spur you talk about the flick with other people more than any other movie released this year.
WWE CM Punk – The Best in the World
Hank loves this dude, and I’m almost sold myself.
X-Com: Enemy Unknown 360 | PS3
So happy about this one. I’m not even a huge fan of the original series, but I love that people upset over the much-hyped, long-delayed FPS got the game they really wanted in Enemy Unkown. I hear nothing but great things, and it’s doing wonders towards introducing a classic franchise to a new set of gamers. Seriously, there are almost tears here…
Little Shop of Horrors
I love this movie almost as much as I love calling it “Frank Oz’s follow up to Muppets Take Manhattan.” Seriously… that felt great! This thing is utterly insane, and wonderfully fantastic. Everybody gives an absurdly awesome performance, especially Ricky Moranis and a nitrus-addled, masochistic Steve Martin. Better still, this set includes the full color original ending, which features the monstorous plant devouring the two leads and taking over the city for (I believe) the first time.
Pokemon Black and White 2
I thought this was a sequel to the Michael Jackson video, but instead of Bart Simpson and George Wendt, what do I find? Pocket Monsters! VILLAINY!
The Great Mouse Detective
Basil of Baker Street! Always found it strange that one of the few times Disney didn’t adapt it was a complete carbon copy of Sherlock Holmes. Which was public domain, and free to use BTW. I love this film. I remember the marketing was in full swing on my first trip to Disney World and I’ll never fucking forget that. Okay, that’s hardly a recommendation but it’s all I got right now.
Rock of Ages
Of course you don’t want to see this movie. Most of America certainly didn’t. But surely you have someone in your life with horrible taste. Support Laser Time (we’re desperate hear.)
Fable: The Journey
We still doing this franchise? Sure Kinect, why Not?!
Dragon Ball Z Kinect
Oh, like DBZ fans haven’t spent their hard earned money on something stupider.
Kirby: 20th Anniversary Dream Collection
The last Wii game we’ll every buy! For real this time…
SAVE ON UPCOMING GAMES AND SUPPORT LASER TIME
Medal of Honor: Warfighter 360 *NEW*
-Pre-order for Amazon exclusive Tin Case AND early access to the Battlefield 4 Beta
Assassin’s Creed III 360 | PS3
-EXCLUSIVE: FREE Steelbook Case upgrade with art by Alex Ross
Halo 4 | Halo 4 Limited Edition *NEW*
-Pre-order and receive exclusive customizable “Web” armor skin
Call of Duty Black Ops II 360 | PS3 *NEW*
-Pre-order any edition and get the Nuketown 2025 bonus map for FREE plus an Amazon exclusive Call of Duty: Black Ops II Wallpaper
Playstation All- Stars: Battle Royale
-Pre-order PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale and receive an exclusive set of costumes. This set includes additional costumes for Kratos, Fat Princess, PaRappa, Colonel Radec, Sweet Tooth, Sly Cooper, Nathan Drake, Big Daddy, Heihachi Mishima, and Toro Inoue
LEGO Lord of the Rings
-$10 in-store credit
-Pre-order WWE ’13 and get a free download of Pennywise’s new album, All or Nothing plus access to play as “Iron” Mike Tyson
Hitman: Absolution 360 | PS3
-FREE Bartoli Custom Pistol, with built-in, high-spec sight and silencer to give excellent accuracy and an extremely high rate of fire with pre-order
Family Guy: Back to the Multiverse
– Pre-order Family Guy: Back to the Multiverse and unlock Evil Stewie and Evil Mayor West costumes
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