Bestest New Releases for the end of January


Shop cheap, shop new, and support your pals at Laser Time for a chance to win a $20 Amazon Gift Card…

You have to know this drill by now? We (ir)regularly highlight the weeks best new game and movie deals, highlight some comics for that ass, and you noble warriors of commerce out there use our links to help your buddies at Laser Time. We always encourage you wonderful dickweeds to Donate via Paypal and buy a t-shirt from the Laser Time store, but the easiest way to help us keep the lights on here in by shopping Amazon through our links below and on the right hand side bar. We’ve simply highlighted some new and cheap thing you might like, BUT NO, you don’t have to buy that item specifically. Simply enter Amazon through one of our links, search for what you do want, purchase in the same visit, and you’ll kick back a couple sheckles into the LT coffers. If enough of you do it, we might be able to keep this ship afloat, so in exchange for enduring out consistent pluggery, we’re offering up a $20 Amazon Gift Card just for leaving a comment below.

The Last of Us
Not sure if it’s the case for everyone, but I feel like Last of Us will be the spiritual bookend to this console generation. Sure, you’re gonna get some expected sequels, some licensed titles, and other stuff that slipped past their Holiday 2012 launch before the launch of PS4 and Xbone. But it’s damn likely The Last of Us will probably the life-affirming crescendo to the heyday of your PS360s. Sorta like an Okami or Shadow of the Colossus that’ll actually sell! Why else would I get off of a (highly delayed!) plane from E3 2013, drop my luggage in my apartment lobby, and speed off to buy it with my little remaining strength and energy? After all the unveiling, announcements, and console prick waving, Last of Us was still all I could think about. I’ve played but a sliver, yet I can already tell that it’s well worth the “perfect” scores its receiving.

Jack the Giant Slayer
WARNING: Not to be confused with Jack the Giant Killer, which just popped up in Netflix’s New Release list. Although to be quite honest, it may very well be a separate shade of the same shit. I’ve heard nothing but negativity on this one long, and those nasty rumblings came about so early, I stopped reading reviews altogether after they seemed to immediately validate the stench emanating from Bryan Singer’s troubled production. So while I consider it my duty to watch anything made by the guy who directed The Usual Suspects and the first two X-Men movies, this ain’t high up on my list of priorities.

Animal Crossing: New Leaf
I can’t believe that even while frantically playing Last of Us, Luigi’s Mansion, and Monster Hunter, with scant hours of free time numbering in single digits per week, I’m setting everything aside to pick flowers and catch fish. I won’t pretend that Animal Crossing’s completely sunk its claws into me, but I found all of your enthusiasm on Facebook and Twitter infectious enough to give it a shot. Sure, I have the ulterior motive of trying to play it with my lady friend, thus further shoving her into gaming and a general understanding of what I’d rather be doing than taking her to brunch and the botanical gardens, but I really think it says a lot that amid the loud braying emanating from shiny new shit for shiny new consoles, people are still batshit in love with Nintendo’s soothing “anit-game.” Obviously, that Smash Bros announcement didn’t hurt either.

Workaholics: Season 3
I’ve been told by many of you folks to check this show out, and I finally have and am happy to say I’ve enjoyed it quite a bit. Many of you have tweeted me calling this “TalkRadar: The TV series” and while I think calling “Always Sunny in Philadelphia: The Next Generation” might be more accurate, I can’t help but agree that this threesome certainly bears a heightened resemblance to TDar’s personas/younger days. Maybe instead of purchasing Laser Time’s web hosting and equipment, we should’ve sunk that money into a Comedy Central pilot…. SHIT!

DAMMIT! I’m so mad I didn’t get to check this out at E3! (Where I only once saw it playable, strangely positioned next to DuckTales: Remastered in Sony’s booth?) This thing could very well be a total “6 out of 10” through and through, but will still rock the fat ass simply by being a fucking Deadpool game. Know This: The Merc with the Mouth is THE PERFECT  video game character. Fuck your reluctant heroes, and your noble superhero scout masters. Whether or not the intellectual nerds among us will admit it, the very type of behavior Deadpool revels in is the exact type of satisfaction and glory players desire from gameplay. Deadpool kills for fun and sport, flourish and grandeur, and his fourth wall-breaking chicanery never lets you forget it. This game can’t truly be bad.

Movie 43
Haven’t seen this almost unanimously panned film, but you know what? Never trust critics when it comes to comedy. Office Space, Big Lebowski. Something Else! All of their initial reviews would’ve put them in the Metacritic red had that fine reductive service existed back then, so I always keep an open mind to any movie trying to make me laugh that, doesn’t hinge entirely on Kate Hudson finding the right guy. I can almost guarantee there’s treasure to be mined in almost any sketch-based film, and I can’t wait to check this shit out.

Project X Zone
I’ve been waiting for too damn long to dive headfirst into this fan service-soaked fireball from the East, ‘cause it looks pretty damn rewarding. Obviously, the Capcom roster is main draw for me, but where the hell else are you going to see that coupled with appearances from characters .hack and the fake Bruce Willis from Die Hard Arcade?! By the looks of it, Sega, Namco and Capcom have teamed up for one gloriously weird tribute to 90s gaming.

Life Force
Not to be confused with Konami’s fantastic sequel to Gradius, this is a movie, and it has space vampires and Patrick Stewart. I wish I remembered more, but all I can recollect is one of the gorier scenes featuring a melting/exploding human being I’ve ever seen. Hmmm… maybe ask GamerGirlTalk. Her Poison Popcorn work leads me to believe she’s kinda the expert on these things.

A WHOLE BUNCHA STEELBOOK BLUS – Universal rereleased several of it’s finest movies on Blu-ray with super cool art, enhanced packaging and lower prices. Have a look:
Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
The Big Lebowski
Shaun of the Dead
Hot Fuzz
Pitch Black


Tom Clancy’s Splinter Cell Blacklist  360  |  PS3
– Receive the Upper Echelon Pack, which includes the Gold Glowing Goggles, the Upper Echelon Suit, and the Aral Sea Co-op Mission
-pre-order for exclusive NCAA Football Ultimate Team PAC 12 Conference Pack including key PAC 12 players and bonus game extension
Lost Planet 3
-pre-order for free Punisher Pack DLC, including exclusive Incinerator (Particle Thrower Variant), NEVEC Punisher (Pulse Rifle), and Spit-Fire (Grenade Launcher Variant)
Shin Megami Tensei IV
-pre-order for Limited Edition Box Set, including a 176-page Strategy & Design Book, a Shin Megami Tensei Music Collection CD, and a Collectible Slipcase and an Amazon Exlusive. In addition to the Limited Edition Box Set
The Bureau: XCOM Declassified
-pre-order for free CodeBreakers Bonus Mission
Madden NFL 25th Anniversary Edition
-Pre-order for a 17 week Madden Ultimate Team pack subscription, and exclusive offers for DirecTV and NFL Sunday Ticket. A $400 value!
Disney Infinity
-Pre-order and receive a power disc pack free with your selected starter pack and free bonus figure
Kingdom Hearts HD 1.5 Remix
-pre-order to guarantee an upgrade to the Limited Edition with art book.
Arkham City: Origins
-$10 in-store credit
-Playable Deathstroke character
Final Fantasy XIV: A Realm Reborn
-pre-order to receive a token for early access to the game and digital in-game content including a Mog cap and minion pet
Grand Theft Auto V
-pre-order and gain the ability to pilot the Atomic Blimp, the most iconic and leisurely aircraft in the Los Santos skies!
Saints Row IV
-Pre-order for the Commander in Chief DLC Pack, including the Screaming Eagle vehicle, Uncle Sam uniform and the ‘Merica weapon.
NBA 2K14
-Pre-order NBA 2K14 now for PS3 and Xbox 360 and receive the King James Bonus Pack! Includes the following bonus content: Extra content for Path to Greatness Mode, LeBron James unlocked in Blacktop Mode, LeBron James Signature Skill, 10,000 Virtual Currency

27 thoughts on “Bestest New Releases for the end of January

  1. I really really hope Deadpool is worth playing, got a nagging feeling its gonna be very middle of the road. Prove me wrong High Moon Studios!

  2. I got my first paycheck today, and I’m not going to lie: I debated for nearly 3 minutes before deciding that buying The Last of Us was a worthy investment. I want to tap into the buzz before anything more is spoiled for me and I’ve completely succumbed to the hype.

  3. Last of us is so great. I easily prefer it over Bioshock infinite in almost every regard.

  4. I’ve loved the Last of Us so far, but I’ve been remodelling so I haven’t had a chance to finish it, hope to this weekend. Animal Crossing is great as expected. But I’m saving a little money so I can finally buy the Before Watchmen trades July 2, and July 18.
    I’ve been waiting for a while now, but I’m a huge fan so it’ll be worth it. Never boarded the hate train for it.

  5. I think Deadpool’s gonna end up being a mediocre game that tried too hard… but I
    m still gonna play it. Here’s hoping!

  6. Nice to see this again, though it is a little hot for January, I must say 😛
    Also, great to hear you have a girlfriend again, I don’t know if you’ve mentioned it on podcasts yet (I’m a little behind, what with finishing high school and exams and graduation and shit lately), but congratulations 🙂
    And Animal Crossing is way better than it has any right to be, since you’ve now sunk yourself into one half of Brett’s legendary “baby game” duo, does this mean you’ll be picking up the new Pokemon in October? Because you really should!

  7. I really wish I had a PS3 to play the Last of Us. I know I should just get one but with the new consoles coming out in a few months I don’t think it’s worth it.

  8. that scott pilgrim rerelease hngggggggggg. I already have the original blu-ray, if only i had a 20$ amazon gift card to make the rerelease worth pitching!

  9. I feel like shit after having forgot to use the links when I pre-ordered Saints Row 4 Collectors Edition and the PS4 a few weeks ago. I’m guessing if I cancel them and re-order through the links, that would work, right? This is why planning ahead is important, I suppose.

  10. Already bought Shaun of the Dead in its glorious steelbook packaging. Seriously, this movie looks gorgeous even before it gets anywhere near my PS3.

    The question remains- do I pick up the much more culturally important, super serious Last of Us or the cheaper, far more crazy and funny Deadpool first? I’m sure I’ll get both eventually, but which will come first?

  11. Perfect time to post this, since Animal Crossing is on sale. I canceled my pending order so I can click through this post and buy it through your affiliate link.

    1. Movie 43 isnt anywhere near Big Lebowski. It has a few ok parts such as Super Hero Speed Dating. It also has Hugh Jackman with neckballs.

  12. I will get the Deadpool game when it’s a bit cheaper (probably will happen since it’s published by Activison).

    Also, I will be broke trying to collect those Universal steelbook (Scott Pilgrim, Shaun, Hot Fuzz, Serenity, Hellboy 2, etc., etc.).

  13. Picked up Animal Crossing for cheap today! Amazon is currently doing some wicked game deals!

  14. Got the Big Lebowski Steelbook BluRay, & its soooooo rad! Too poor for The Last of Us, however :'(

  15. Animal Crossing is fantastic, I love just waking up and playing an hour or two of it.

  16. It’s not on the list, but Van Helsing is also out in steelbook form. That movie is so bad it’s good. My friends and I went to go see it, 100% sober, and were cracking up the entire film.

  17. I kinda want to try Deadpool. I love the comics, but I just think it will be too hard to convey the wackiness properly.

  18. Cross zone reminds me of the greatest video game hero ever maybe you have heard of our lord and savour Jebus?

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