Cheap Predictions: Pick Hell in a Cell results and win!

DaverTime


Correctly predicting WWE results can be hell, but do you have what it takes to win at Hell in a Cell? Prove it by testing your predictive mettle against Dave and make your mark on the next Cheap Popcast episode!

Hey all! If you haven’t heard the Summerslam Cheap Popcast, I’m made a monthly tradition of predicting the results of a pre-determined event! The reader who makes the most correct predictions gets to pick the song that plays at the conclusion of our Hell in a Cell-themed episode of Cheap Popcast! First, though, a recap of the Ballegrounds predictions. Even with the cluserfuck of a main event that nobody could have predicted, I still did pretty poorly, going 3-for-8. True to form, the winner of the predictions pick-em is just as crazy as the main event. A mysterious user going simply as “Ryan,” went 7-for-8 INCLUDING the main-event no contest, but he didn’t include a song. I emailed him about it, so we’ll fit that in during the break if he gets back to me. KeatonDC went 6-for-8 and won the tiebreaker, choosing “The American Dream” Dusty Rhodes’ theme, so that will close the episode.

Here’s how it goes. I’m going to make my predictions in this here article, and then open up the replies to you awesome listeners. You will then pick a winner (or if you’re feeling risky a rare draw/double DQ) for each match (don’t worry about getting the finish right, I’m just looking for winners), and then, just in case there’s a tie for correct predictions, pick a running time for the final match listed (the presumed main event) as a tiebreaker. A housekeeping note; I’ve removed the Money in the Bank point-system, due to the potential for confusion (plus, just tallying results is enough math for me). Go ahead and predict a cash-in if it behooves you (or to explain your reasoning for a pick), but you won’t gain or lose points for getting it right or wrong.

What does the winner get? Well, you can make your mark on the next Cheap Popcast episode by choosing the next show’s closing theme. Pick the wrestler theme and include a YouTube URL to a wrestler’s theme alongside your predictions (including the running time of the final match listed) and I’ll give you a shout-out before throwing to our episode-ender. Let’s kick off the predictions!


INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: CURTIS AXEL (CHAMP) VS BIG E. LANGSTON
If there’s as good a time as any to end the “Axel as IC Champ” experiment, it’s here. Big E is hot off a face turn, so putting the strap on him would push him even further (plus legitimize the belt even more). Langston pins Axel.


DIVAS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: AJ LEE (CHAMP) VS BRIE BELLA
Brie’s getting better, but I still think AJ needs a bit more time with the belt to continue things, so AJ makes Brie tap. Again.


TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: THE RHODES BROTHERS (CHAMPS) VS THE USOS VS THE SHIELD
Poor Usos. Another title shot they won’t capitalize on. The Rhodeses are too hot as a team right now to cut down with a loss, so I say The Rhodes Brothers win.


HELL IN A CELL HANDICAP MATCH: CM PUNK VS RYBACK AND PAUL HEYMAN
Oh-kay, the expiration date for this feud is fast-approaching. Unless there’s some Lesnar-focused chicanery to extend this, I see no reason to keep the chase going, so I say Punk wins.


WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: ALBERTO DEL RIO (CHAMP) VS JOHN CENA
Psh, John Cena holding the second-most-important WWE belt? Ain’t gonna happen. Cena will put in some offense, but ADR will pull some sort of arm-related cheat in order to keep his title. Cena’s potentially-reinjured arm goes onto main event Raw for the next month. Alberto Del Rio wins.


LOS MATADORES VS THE REAL AMERICANS
I’m not happy that Cesaro’s gonna lose on Pay-Per-View again, but I hope he gets to do some sort of insane feat of strength. Giant-swinging both Matadores simultaneously? Spinning Torito on his finger like a baskeball? Regardless, I’ll enjoy that more than seeing Los Matadores beat The Real Americans.


HELL IN A CELL WWE CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: RANDY ORTON VS DANIEL BRYAN (SPECIAL GUEST REFEREE SHAWN MICHAELS)
I stand by Bryan-Punk at Survivor Series (maybe Bryan-Cena-Punk), so Bryan needs to finally win the big one. There’s plenty of red herrrings (Shawn turning, Big Show turning), but I saw the WWE swerves us yet again by giving DB the clean win. Bryan pins Orton.

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Alright, there’s my picks. Sound off below with your match predictions, (including the Bryan-Orton running time) as well as a YouTube link to your wrestler theme pick. Good luck, everyone!

Related Laser Time Crap!

24 thoughts on “Cheap Predictions: Pick Hell in a Cell results and win!”

  1. Axel b Langston
    Brie b AJ
    Rhodes b Usos / Shield
    Punk b Ryback/Heyman
    ADR beats Cena (in a cheap way) (Sandow cashes in and pins ADR)
    Real Americans b Los Matadores
    Bryan beats Orton (clean, but barely) @ 23:20

    I fully expect Orton to try and RKO HBK afterwards and get Sweet Chin Music’d

    Theme choice: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7DTuUvIytoY

    Reply

    1. If Dave didn’t close out one of the CP episodes with that already, I would have went with it. Best theme currently in WWE

      Reply

  5. Langston pins Axel

    If WWE want a face power couple, they would give Brie the Title sooooo Brie pins AJ

    Rhodes brothers win by Goldust pinning Rollins.

    CM Punk wins by pinning Heyman.

    As much as it pains me to say it…. *sigh* Los Matdores defeat The Real Americans via pinfall.

    The WHC match can go either, If Cena Wins he’ll make the title more relevant, If Del Rio wins, he proves he’s a good champion. I’m going with Cena on this one.

    Bryan wins the WWE Title at a 32:43. Triple H screws him out of the title and reverses the decision, this prompts Michaels to superkick both HHH and Orton and Bryan beats the shit out of Triple H and takes the title anyway.

    Reply

  6. 1. Langston pins Axel
    2. AJ beats Bella via submission
    3. Rhodes win (pin Shield)
    4. I would have thought Lesnar for this ppv, next month is survivor series, they can drag it out one more and have punk v heyman at the series. Ryback wins in a fluky way.
    5. I think the fed is trying to keep Cena away from the new corporation or whatever they’re calling it. Giving him the belt could theoretically keep it on Smackdown where he can fight the Wyatt’s, ADR, a returning Christian, that’s about it. That being said Cena has a Hogan sized ego, and this can be dragged out another pay per view, ADR makes Cena tap.
    6. Los Matadores pin Real Americans, Cesaro needs to turn face but that’s a seperate issue.
    7. This goes into Survivor Series but my guess is in a sub par survivor series match, I see Big Show turning next month. Bryan pins Orton in 21 minutes.

    Also Dave needs to give his own running time for the main event.

    Theme: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7yoMU4ij2lc

    Reply

  7. Langston beats Axel
    AJ beats Brie
    The Shield beats Usos & Rhodes via cheat (continue feud)
    Punk beats Ryback/Heyman
    ADR beats Cena (no cash in)
    Los Matadores (sadly) beat The Real Americans
    Orton beats Bryan (after Show turn and HBK browbeaten by HHH to count the pin) 32:30

    Reply

  8. Big E over Axel
    Brie over AJ – Unfortunately
    The Rhodes Brothers retain – Obviously
    Punk over Ryback and Heyman
    LOLCENAWINS – I’m hoping for Sadow to cash in on this
    Los Matadores over The Real Americans – What crazy spot will El Torito do this time?
    Orton over Bryan in 34 minutes

    Welcome Back Cena
    http://youtu.be/Ocf1BizRFVc

    Reply

  10. Big E
    AJ
    Rhodes Brothers
    Punk, but Heyman gets away again. This can’t end until a Punk/Brock rematch.
    Cena wins via disqualification or count out, Del Rio retains
    Sandow cashes in and wins the title
    Los Matadores
    Orton wins in 24:30 after a SCM or Big Show interference
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IkiOGBL78aQ – Satoshi Kojima’s theme because it sounds like something that should be in Castlevania.

    Reply

  11. I’m actually pretty excited for this PPV! It’s actually looking like a decent card, and a good friend of mine [who also listens to the LT Network] and I are going to be there live! Alright, prediction time:

    -INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: CURTIS AXEL (CHAMP) VS BIG E. LANGSTON
    Axel’s been losing steam as he’s being overshadowed by Ryback. At the other end of the spectrum, Big E. Langston’s freshly turn as a babyface gives him the potential to make a rise because three ain’t enough, he needs FIVE! [For those that watched his babyface run in NXT <_<]
    [b]Langston pins Axel[/b]

    -DIVAS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: AJ LEE (CHAMP) VS BRIE BELLA
    As crazy as it sounds [no pun intended], I'd like to see Brie take the belt off of AJ, even though she is Punk's new squeeze.
    [b]Brie Bella pins AJ Lee[/b]

    -TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: THE RHODES BROTHERS (CHAMPS) VS THE USOS VS THE SHIELD
    This will be the match of the night. Tag team wrestling seems to be picking up in the WWE and these [teams] are one of the best to watch.
    [b]The Rhodes Brothers retain against The Usos/The Shield[/b]

    -HELL IN A CELL HANDICAP MATCH: CM PUNK VS RYBACK AND PAUL HEYMAN
    This really should be the end of the CM Punk/Heyman feud, but there's a possibility that it's gonna get stretched out, and Punk's still has some nagging injuries.
    [b]Ryback/Heyman beat CM Punk[/b]

    -WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: ALBERTO DEL RIO (CHAMP) VS JOHN CENA
    LolCenaWins
    [b]Cena pins ADR[/b]

    *I have those feels that Sandow is cashing in tonight*

    -LOS MATADORES VS THE REAL AMERICANS
    This is an okay filler, I'd like The Real Americans to go over as they are a solid heel tag team and Cesaro's strangely getting over.
    [b]The Real Americans pin Los Matadores[/b]

    -HELL IN A CELL WWE CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: RANDY ORTON VS DANIEL BRYAN (SPECIAL GUEST REFEREE SHAWN MICHAELS)
    I once had faith in Bryan to be the official face of the WWE, but with all this flip flopping of the title and subtle burial [despite being entirely over with the "Universe"], it's kinda lost steam in my mind. This is make it or break it time to see if he can really capture and run with it. WWE has the ability to let people down, but I'm gonna hang on to that glimmer of hope.
    [b]DBry pins Orton[/b] @ 25 mins

    http://youtu.be/48UXBPXfKcE

    Reply

  12. Big E pins Axel

    AJ Taps out Bella

    Rhodes Retain gold

    Punk loses just as he did to Axel and Heyman except Lesner runs in to set up a rematch at Survivor Series or maybe at RR.

    ADR over Cena. Making him tap out. Maybe wishful thinking, but c’mon he has an injured arm.

    Los Matadores beat The Real Americans.

    Bryan wins with the help of HBK 24 minutes in.

    Reply

    1. Opening match was changed to Kofi vs Sandow. So I am going to go along and say Sandow wins that… if that has become needed to win.

      Reply

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