This Week’s Best New Releases: Wolfenstein Edition!

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New Wolfenstein, Dragon Ball Z, Wrestlemania, Fast and the Furious and more. Shop and support your pals at Laser Time!

Hola, Laser Timers. Here’s your look at all the shiny newness of this week’s media, with 100% trusted links to their Amazonian listing! We encourage you to do your Amazon shopping through us, because in addition to fast shipping and generally the lowest prices available anywhere, each time you enter Amazon through one of our links and make a purchase, you net your pals at Laser Time a small commission that helps us keep the lights on. A Free and Easy way to contribute to the Laserific cause! You don’t have to purchase the specific item in the link, but simply enter Amazon through any link below or on the right hand sidebar and search/shop like normal. These are but humble recommendations we think you’d enjoy, including movies, comics and upcoming videogame pre-orders. Thanks in advance, and happy shopping.


Wolfenstein: The New Order
You know what? Almost all the Wolfenstein game have been pretty damned good, from Return to Castle Wolfenstein to the 2009 reboot, but the never seem to perform all that well with consumers. Why the hell is that? My stupid theory is, although it certainly bears the name has the name recognition of game played by millions, but… I’m gonna bet that most of them played it for free. Before gaming PCs were even officially “A Thing” I remember all my middle school’s computers were stealthily installed with Wolfenstein 3D shareware. Any time a teacher wasn’t looking, or a librarian was off somewhere masturbating, folks of all races, genders, and backgrounds knew how to fire up DOS and run ol’ Wolfenstein. It would seem that the trouble comes from asking people to pay for it. Which I hope isn’t the case with The New Order, since it looks kind of incredibly. An alternate Nazi-populated future on next-gen consoles with no multiplayer to confuse me. I’m in! Polygon’s review made me do a double take and other outlets are following suit. Might have to stream this thang…

Wrestlemania XXX
I can’t imagine Cheap Popcast fans out there don’t have access to this on the WWE Network, but here it is on Blu-ray for you 21st Century Stragglers! Relive the pain of the end of Undertaker’s streak, and/or the triumph of Danial Bryan’s glimmering moment in the sun. Also available in a pricier Amazon Exclusive Edition that comes with Trading Cards and a WWE book.


Drakengard 3
As a pop culture nerd, it really chaps my ass when I see the number three follow a title when I’ve never heard of the 1st or 2nd. Or maybe I have, and the boring nature of the title just washed right over me like a Hotwire.com commercial. Whatever the case, and whatever the hell this is, it’s on its third iteration, no doubt to the delight of dozens of diehard Drakengard fans. Also available in this week in the category of Drooling Weeaboo, something call Mugen Souls Z!


Her
Spike Jonze weirdo love story between a man and his operating system is truly something you should check the hell out. With all the technology enveloping our lives, statistically speaking, a romance between man and machine is bound to happen to one of you reading this in the very near future (Yes, Japanese pillows count!) I’m a huge fan of Jonze’z work, but I won’t pretend that I fell head over heels in love with this film. However, yes, Scarlett Johansson’s AI performance is astoundingly convincing (was there any doubt Joaquin Phoenix could play a misanthropic introvert?) but I mostly found it’s sedated depiction of the future to be one of the best ever portrayed on screen. Sort of like a bunch of hipsters on the Mass Effect citadel!

Fast & The Furious 6-Movie Blu-ray Collection
If you’re like us, and looking for a way to pour one out to the lovable Paul Walker, you could do a helluva lot worse than this Blu-ray box set. Just before the CG Brandon Lee version of Walker graces the screen one last time, you can enjoy all of these films in High-Def at a fairly low price, including Fast 5 and Furious 6 (OFFICIAL TITLES!) easily two of the best 2 popcorn flicks produced in the last decade. Honestly, I could take or leave the first four, give or take Tokyo Drift, but no amount of instinctual cynicism can allow me to say I’m not batshit excited to see Jason Statham kick cars asses in Fast 7!


Dragon Ball Z – Season 4
The wait is over, DBZ fans! This season features a 16 hour panning shot from left to right as a near motionless Mayor Goku ponders whether or not he has what it take to defeat a seemingly unbeatable opponent. An entire season’s worth of grunting sound effects culminates in a single frame of animation you have to see to believe!


Eastbound & Down – Season 4
Fuck the haters, this show is a fucking godsend. I know Danny McBride is probably sick of playing “this character” in damn near everything, but either way, he’ll probably never play the arrogant idiot finer than in the form of Kenny Powers. With long time collaborator Jody Hill, he and McBride damn near achieve comedic perfection here, and I seriously can’t wait to revisit this show again. (Oh, and I thoroughly recommend folks seek out The Foot Fist Way and Observe and Report too.) In fact, up until the very end of the last episode, Eastbound’s series finale was so very almost my favorite last episode ever.


The Monuments Men
This took a beating from reviewers and at the box office, but I’m 100% on board for anything George Clooney wants to bring to the screen. He’s not just one of humanity’s dreamiest individuals, he’s also got an incredible eye for what film scholars refer to as “Good Shit.” He’s not only remarkably careful in the roles he chooses, “Good Shit” like Gravity and Up in the Air, but he’s even more selective when it comes to the films he writes and directs. Given his track record of Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, Leatherheads, and Good Night and Good Luck, why the hell wouldn’t I be interested in a Clooney-fronted ensemble of dudes trying to recover precious art from Nazi destruction?!

MASSIVE DIGITAL GAME SALE ON AMAZON! As part of Amazon’s Digital Game MAYhem, a ton of great titles have been bundled together and drastically encheapened!

RockStar Ultimate Collection – $25.49
Includes 12 games: Bully – Scholarship Edition, Grand Theft Auto 3, Grand Theft Auto IV, GTA Vice City, GTA San Andreas, GTA Episodes from Liberty City, LA Noire, Manhunt, Manhunt 2, Max Payne 2, Max Payne 3, and Midnight Club 2

 


Batman Mega Bundle – $22.50
Includes 3 games & Season Pass DLC: Batman: Arkham Asylum, Batman: Arkham City, Batman: Arkham Origins and Batman: Arkham Origins Season Pass

 


Saints Row Franshise Pack$18.75
Includes 3 games: Saints Row 2, Saints Row 3 – The Full Package, and Saints Row IV

 

 


Ultimate LEGO Bundle – $45.00
Includes 8 Games: The Lego Movie, Lego Batman, Lego Batman 2, Lego Marvel Super Heroes, Lego Harry Potter: Years 1-4, Lego Harry Potter: Years 5-7, Lego: The Hobbit

 


Sonic Everywhere Pack – $12.39
Includes 17 Games: Sonic the Hedgehog, Sonic 2, Sonic 3, Sonic  & Knuckles, Sonic 4 Episode 1, Sonic 4 Episode 2, Dr. Robotnik’s Mean Bean Machine, Sonic Racing: Transformed, Sonic Racing: Transformed – Metal Sonic & Outrun DLC, Sonic Adventure DX: Director’s Cut, Sonic Adventure 2, Sonic Adventure 2 Battle Mode DLC, Sonic Generations, Sonic Generations: Casino Night DLC, Sonic Spinball, Sonic 3D Blast


Metro Franchise Pack – $12.49
Includes 2 Games & DLC: Metro 2033, Metro: Last Light + 2 DLC Packs

 

 


Fireaxis Strat Pack
Includes 3 games: XCOM: Enemy Unknown – Complete Edition, Civilization IV, Civilization V: Gold Edition

 

CAPE CRISIS RECOMMENDS:

 

 

 

 

 

 

UPCOMING VIDEO GAME PRE-ORDER BONUSES
listed roughly in order of release date

Wolfenstein: The New Order
-$10 in-store credit
-Early DOOM Beta access with pre-order
Watch Dogs
-Pre-order for exclusive Signature Shot Pack with unique Biometric Rifle and Viceroy’s Outfit
Murdered: Soul Suspect
-Pre-order for exclusive Digital Strategy Map
UFC 2014
-Pre-order for FREE day-one access to playable Father of Mixed Martial Arts, Bruce Lee!
Elder Scrolls Online
-Pre-order for free Explorer’s Pack featuring Scuttler vanity pet, four bonus treasure maps, and the ability to play as any of the nine races in any Alliance
Madden 15
-Pre-order for Madden Ultimate Team content, a $15 value
Destiny 
-Pre-order for early Beta Access
Dragon Age: Inquisition 
-Deluxe Edition includes Flames of Inquisition ArmorWeapons Arsenal and Armored Mount
Middle Earth: Shadow of Mordor
-Pre-order and receive access to The Dark Ranger
DriveClub – PS4
-Pre-order for Amazon exclusive instant access to the high-powered Mercedes supercar, access to the RUF RT12 R super car, and a driver level boost
Last of Us Remastered
-Pre-order and receive tons of free content including 100 Supply Points (XP) for use in Factions mode; Bonus Joel Skin for use in the Single Player Campaign (must complete the game once to equip); Bonus Ellie Skin for use in the Single Player Campaign (must complete the game once to equip); Increased Crafting Speed for use in the Single Player Campaign; Increased Healing Speed for use in the Single Player Campaign; 9mm Reload Speed Increase Upgrade for use in the Single Player Campaign; Rifle Clip Capacity Increase Upgrade
Evolve 
-Pre-order for free Monster Expansion Pack

4 thoughts on “This Week’s Best New Releases: Wolfenstein Edition!

  1. Is the Shield dvd box set going to be discounted finally due to Juilen being arrested for shooting his wife? Not sure if what he did will influence my viewing of subsequent episodes.

    1. I looked into it and the only issue I found is that the episodes are presented in 16:9 widescreen instead of their original 4:3 presentation. Kinda sucks, but not a total deal breaker

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