4 More Dinosaur Franchises That Should Be Rebooted

Laser Time, dinosaurs, reboots, jurassic park, we're back, barney, extreme dinosaurs, adventures in dinosaur city, prehysteria

Not unlike a fossil, these movie franchises have been covered in dust for years. I say, let’s excavate!

Prehysteria

Laser Time, dinosaurs, reboots, jurassic park, we're back, barney, extreme dinosaurs, adventures in dinosaur city, prehysteria

A personal childhood favorite, this movie follows a brother and sister as a bunch of dino eggs hatch, and a batch of small dinosaurs come under their care. They bond with the mini-dinos until the person who originally found stole the eggs from a “forbidden temple” in South America finds out, pulls a Cruella de Vil, and hires a duo of bumbling burglars to get them back.

The dinos in question, by the way, are:

  • Elvis, the tyrannosaurus
  • Paula, the brachiosaurus
  • Jagger, the stegosaurus
  • Hammer, the triceratops
  • Madonna, the pteranodon

I sense a theme here…

Adventures in Dinosaur City

Laser Time, dinosaurs, reboots, jurassic park, we're back, barney, extreme dinosaurs, adventures in dinosaur city, prehysteria

So yeah, I barely remember this rental from my local video store, but that’s good enough for me. Let’s look at a summary.

The story involves a trio of teenagers, named Timmy, Jamie, and Mick, who enjoy watching their favorite TV show which features anthropomorphic dinosaurs. Wanting to watch it on a better screen, Timmy, the youngest of the three, suggests that they try watching it on his father’s screen in his laboratory. The moment they turn it on, a vortex sucks the three into the TV screen, and into their favorite show. Upon entering the new world, the trio comes across a flightless dimorphodon named Forry. Although reluctant at first to help them, his knowledge of Dinosaur City proves useful, as he guides the three to Tar Town, where they join up with Rex and Tops, two dinosaur freedom fighters willing to ignite a revolution against the villain, Mr. Big, and his caveman henchmen, “The Rockies.”

So it’s like Tron with Dinosaurs. What’s not to like?

We’re Back! A Dinosaur Story

Laser Time, dinosaurs, reboots, jurassic park, we're back, barney, extreme dinosaurs, adventures in dinosaur city, prehysteria

Along with Land Before Time, I loved this movie as a kid, finding it more fun and not as heavy on the heart as Littlefoot’s adventures. Have another summary:

Captain New Eyes travels back in time and feeds dinosaurs his Brain Grain cereal, which makes them intelligent and nonviolent. They agree to go to the Middle Future (this era) in order to grant the wishes of children in New York City. They are to meet Dr. Bleeb of the Museum of Natural History, but get sidetracked with their new friends, tough-talking, street, but secretly soft-hearted Louie and a neglected rich girl named Cecilia, and run into the Captain’s evil brother, Professor Screw Eyes, who has other plans for the dinosaurs.

And in contrast to Land Before Time’s melancholy, the children get forcibly devolved into chimps, which yes, seems like it would be a horrifying process to go through. Yeah, it gets dark.

Extreme Dinosaurs

Laser Time, dinosaurs, reboots, jurassic park, we're back, barney, extreme dinosaurs, adventures in dinosaur city, prehysteria

Extreme! Extreme! Extreme Dinosaurs!

To be fair, I barely remember watching these in the morning before school, but I do so in a positive light, because it delivered humanoid roid-ripped dinos firing lasers, gnarling teeth, and clashing claws. It’s metal. But for some clarity, lets look up a summary:

The series starred a tyrannosaurus (T-Bone), a triceratops (Spike), a stegosaurus (Stegz), and a pteranodon (Bullezeye)…

Because nothing is more extreme than insertion of the letter z. Notzhing!

…that were transformed into super warriors by an inter-dimensional criminal named Argor Zardok.

Because again, why not?

They rebelled against the alien criminal and do battle with Argor’s second group of warriors known as the Evil Raptors.

The raptors are de facto evil. Is that racist? Specist? Did someone get mad that the raptors were popular in Jurassic Park? I will not stand for this!

Eventually, the Raptors’ objective is to cause global warming by increasing the Earth’s temperature, which will make life on earth more comfortable for reptiles.

This means David Icke is right. The lizard men are out to get us! Check your nearest congressmen’s eyes for slits!

Honorable Mention: Barney

Laser Time, dinosaurs, reboots, jurassic park, we're back, barney, extreme dinosaurs, adventures in dinosaur city, prehysteria

Whatever happened to Barney? I say bring him back, but as less of a friendly drunkard and more carnivorous, coming to life when the children are alone, luring them close with songs and promises of fun, only to slowly pick them off one by one and devour them, then getting a BJ from Baby Bop behind the school.

Article by contributor Cody Stovall.

10 thoughts on “4 More Dinosaur Franchises That Should Be Rebooted

  1. Oh my fucking god. Prehysteria. A few years back I feel like I spent hours trying to google my memories of Prehysteria. I remember the third movie with the gold course but couldn’t for the life of me figure out what it was or what it was called.

    Thank you so much. I feel like I can die peacefully now.

  2. You’re lucky “Lastertimecontrib”. I thought I was going to see Carnosaur on here. In which case I would be getting prepared to hunt you down and strangle you with your own intestines.

    I’ll add in “Dinosaurs”, the live action sitcom. If I still had cable, I would watch the hell out of that.

  3. Side note: Anyone notice how much that T-rex in We’re Back looks like a scrotum with a flaccid penis above it?

    I blame Chris for my seeing dicks in everything.

    1. Guess the artist decided to draw a penis & add arms, legs, a tail & teeth to it out of boredom but endedd up making it into a character anyway lol wouldn’t be the first time an animated character was created around a penis. Remember Arnold’s grandpa from Hey Arnold?

  4. I agree on Prehysteria, my younger brother and I must have rented the first two films in that franchise several dozen times through the course of our childhood. Moonbeam Entertainment made some great straight to video b-level shlock for kids to snag at their local video store.

    Dinosaur city always disturbed me as a child when it would air o Disney Channel or whatnot, its reminiscent of the terror that is represented in the Super Mario Bros. film as well. Who wants to live in these perpetual dark nightmare cities where anthropomorphized dinosaurs have adopted the shittiest traits of metropolis dwelling scum and street toughs?

    Couldn’t handle we’re back, i was an animation snob early, and crap like this instantly nauseated me as a 10-12 year old. Rock-a-doodle is a line, and if your movie is more of a mess than Rock-a-doodle, no can watch.

    Extreme Dinosaurs was late for me, a Saturday morning cartoon long after activities made anything not X-Men or Eco-Squad something I just didn’t have time for. Great logo though, ripping through diamond plate is a trend that sadly has come and gone.

    But, most importantly, you forgot what I think is one of the best Dino franchises despite getting no love. May I present Dinosaucers, which is just excellent. I wish I could hype it, but dang, its the web, Google it! … after this awesome opening and theme song blow s your mind back to the Triassic! Enjoy!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gy7fO2i9y94

  5. Oh my god I watched so much of Prehysteria.
    I haven’t thought about it since the Dinosaur episode of Laser Time. I think now would be a good time for me to listen to that episode again.

  6. I remember watching Extreme Dinosaurs as a kid. That show was pretty cool. (man the 1990’s & 2000’s had some great kid shows) I think it would make a pretty awesome live action movie as long as Micael Bay doesn’t make it. But seeing how it was inspired by the TMNT franchise which has a live action big screen movie it’s unlikely to ever see Extreme Dinosaurs make it to the big screen because also it has been forgotten now by most people or people were simply born after the shows time wont be lucky enough to see it.

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