The battleground? WWE’s next big show, also called Battleground. The prize? Your choice of song in next month’s Cheap Popcast. Dave and Hank have made their picks… now arm yourself with your own and go to war!
Hiiiii. As we’ve been doing for awhile now, the reader who makes the most correct predictions gets to pick the song that plays at the conclusion of next month’s episode of Cheap Popcast! First, though, a recap of the LT gang’s Payback picks: of the four LaserTime contributors who submitted picks, (Brett) beat everybody as the only person to correctly predict more than half the matches with four correct. Carolyn was in second with three picks right, while Hank and myself fell way behind with two. Fortunately, we were not dead last, as a few commenters only got one pick right. Amongst the Cheap Popcast listeners who contributed, welcome-to-good-burger won by getting three correct picks and was forty seconds closer to the correct main event time than runner-up PhilKenSebben. Good burger chose the NWO Wolfpac theme, though since PKS was so close, I’ll probably play his choice of Pentagon Jr’s Lucha Underground theme (especially since I just started bingeing on that show this week.
Anywho, here’s how the prediction contest goes. The LaserTime gang is going to make picks in this here article, and then open up the replies to you awesome listeners. You will then pick a winner (or if you’re feeling frisky, a rare draw/no contest) for each match (don’t worry about getting the finish right, I’m just looking for winners, if any), and then, just in case there’s a tie for correct predictions, pick a running time for the final match listed (the presumed main event) as a tiebreaker. Feel free to pick a Money in the Bank cash-in, but I don’t count non-announced matches, so correctly predicting one won’t affect your score.
What does the winning commenter get, though? Well, you can make your mark on the next PPV-themed Cheap Popcast episode by choosing a theme to close a segment. Pick the wrestler theme and include a YouTube URL to a wrestler’s theme alongside your predictions (including the running time of Rollins-Lesnar match) and I’ll give you a shout-out on next month’s episode. Got it? Good. Now, onto each LaserTimer’s predictions!
1-KING BARRETT VS. R-TRUTH (KINGSHIP ON THE LINE)
Just like I said last month, this feud is culminating with the King’s crown on the line. As funny as King What’s Up can be, and as much as I desire a spider-free kingdom, R-Truth is already over with the crowd (and without the crown), while King Barrah needs to have at least a shred of dignity with his title. I say Barrett finally wins a PPV match for the first time in forever.
2- RANDY ORTON VS. SHEAMUS
I have a special distaste for Orton and Sheamus fighting, since I saw them do battle in front of a raucous Raw-after-WrestleMania crowd that chanted about their distaste for their fight. Hopefully that lit a fire under the duo’s asses and they’ll pull out something special, especially since Orton is now more motivated than ever. Since every MITB winner has to lose a bunch until they become champ, I say Orton pulls this one out.
3- WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS THE PRIME TIME PLAYERS VS. THE NEW DAY (TITLE MATCH)
This is a tough one. The tag team division is pretty sparse right now with most of the top teams sidelined by injury (Kiddsaro, Rowan/Harper, Usos) and the other half too buried to ever amount to anything (Matadores, Ascension, Meta Powers). I say The New Day wins their belt back so that the only other team that doesn’t lose all the time (The Lucha Dragons) can win the straps at SummerSlam. That, or the WWE brings back the Dudleys to boost viewership for SummerSlam.
4- ROMAN REIGNS VS. BRAY WYATT
Bray desperately needs a win here. Ever since ‘Mania, his only victory of note was against Ryback, which really didn’t amount to anything. Even though Wyatt is a bit bulletproof given his gimmick, a big win here and there would make him more of an attraction. I say he wins here with Harper interfering and re-joining his former leader. Then we get some sick Reigns-Harper hoss-fests on Raw next month.
5- UNITED STATES CHAMPION JOHN CENA VS. KEVIN OWENS (TITLE MATCH)
While I’d prefer to see Cena’s reign end with a surprise entrant in his US Open challenge pulling out a win on Raw, this is the time and place for Owens to finally win. Owens is on a losing streak for the first time in awhile, so he needs to get some heat back, and there’s no better way than to pin Cena again. I say he does so with a slight bit of underhandedness (though hopefully not Wyatt-level) and then tears the house down with a sick battle against Cesaro at SummerSlam.
6- WWE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION SETH ROLLINS VS. BROCK LESNAR (TITLE MATCH)
Any time the main event of a WWE PPV isn’t super-simple to predict, I’m excited. This is one of those times. I could very easily see Brock brutalizing Rollins and winning since Lesnar’s already on the hook for SummerSlam (where he can either lose via chicanery or get cashed in on). Rollins could get a cheap win or just cause a DQ and that could also set up a SummerSlam rematch. WWE tends to go with the least interesting option so I say Lesnar wins by DQ and we get the promise of a clean finish on the next show.
Up next… Hank’s picks!