BoJack Horseman Season Two premiered on Netflix last week, and chances are you’re already finished binging the latest dive into hilarious Hollywood slime. I can’t blame you; I can’t get enough of the colorful comedy cast myself.
Hey, why don’t we rank that cast?
First, a bit of housekeeping: these names were taken from the main, recurring, and minor character list on the show’s Wikipedia page. I did cut three names because finding pictures was nigh impossible — they would have been the bottom three anyway. So let’s get to it!
34 – Goober (Fred Savage)
Is that Santa? No, that’s the unlikeable Goober (both in the fictional and real show) from Horsin’ Around. “Go home, Goober!”
33 – Angela Diaz (Anjelica Huston)
She’s one of the producers of Horsin’ Around, and the person responsible for the split between BoJack and Herb Kazzaz. Heartless.
32 – Bradley Hitler-Smith (Adam Conover)
“Yowza wowza bo-bowza!” The Horsin’ Around studio audience doesn’t like Bradley, and neither do must of us. At least his name was a good sight gag when it first popped up on screen.
31 – Joelle Clark (Alison Brie)
Both Bradley and Joelle are essentially the “other” kids on Horsin’ Around. Joelle gets bonus points for having something of a story arc when she shows up with a faux British accent.
30 – Quentin Tarantulino (Kevin Bigley)
Other than the pun, there’s not a lot of substance to Quentin here. But man, what a good pun. More like “the Bride versus the Crazy 8 Legs,” am I right?
29 – Mr. Witherspoon (Stephen Colbert)
There’s a weird correspondence between characters and their voice actors, and Mr. Witherspoon oddly resembles Mr. Colbert. He really only exists to die and make Princess Carolyn’s quitting more awkward, though.
28 – Charley Witherspoon (Raphael Bob-Waksberg)
I get a kick out of show creators voicing a character (see: The Life & Times of Tim), but Charley here is really only good for some occasional slapstick.
27 – Andrew Garfield (Paul F. Tompkins)
Spidey briefly dates Sarah Lynn, and she brings him lasagna when he’s in the hospital. Get it? Get it!? Also it’s funny that he’s voiced by someone else.
26 – Wayne (Wyatt Cenac)
Another boyfriend, this time to Diane. He’s mostly just there for satire, but I have a sneaking suspicion BuzzFeed did some sponsored content of their own…
25 – Rutabaga Rabitowitz (Ben Schwartz)
Almost everything Ben Schwartz does is gold. Remember good ol’ Mr. Witherspoon about four entries ago? Rutabaga is the one to super cross the line on his way out the door when the bullfrog dies.
24 – Hank Hippopopalaus (Phillip Baker Hall)
Another character made of pure satire, Hank’s secretary-spooning scandal makes for a great plot line. Brilliant casting too.
23 – A Ryan Seacrest Type (Adam Conover)
Another character with satire oozing from every Proactiv-clogged pore, faux Ryan Seacrest gets some of the most Hollywood (or should I say, “Hollywoo?”) ignorant lines in the show.
22 – Corduroy Jackson-Jackson (Brandon T. Jackson)
BoJack Horseman is full of great character names, and this is one of the best. And if you like jerk-off humor (a.k.a. autoerotic asphyxiation), you’ve got the Secretariat co-star to thank.
21 – Dr. Allen Hu (Ken Jeong)
Another great character name (think of famous BBC sci-fi doctors if you don’t get the joke), Dr. Allen is half-responsible for Sarah Lynn’s druggy existence. Plus, he’s got a great business card.
20 – Officer Meow-Meow Fuzzyface (Cedric Yarbrough)
Reno 911’s Cedric Yarbrough playing another cop? Good call. Having a cutesy name no criminal could ever take seriously? Even better.
19 – Sebastian St. Clair (Keegan-Michael Key)
Boy, Keegan is everywhere nowadays, huh? The Key & Peele star plays the narcissistic snow leopard perfectly, even if he’s really just there to throw a wrench in Diane and Mr. Peanutbutter’s relationship.
18 – Neal McBeal (Patton Oswalt)
Neal McBeal the Navy Seal — another great character name. His story arc in the early parts of Season One perfectly set up the show’s cringe humor.
We get into the really good stuff on page two!