Another Thanksgiving has come and gone, and Christmas time is just around the corner. The classic, sugar-coated traditional films will be playing all month long. A Christmas Story, Home Alone, White Christmas — these are mainstays of the holiday season. But what about the horror fans? Thankfully, there are some great Christmas horror movies out there, and some fun ones as well (I wouldn’t want you to confuse these for well-made films). Here are 5 hand-picked selections.
A Christmas Horror Story
Trick ‘r Treat was the last horror anthology that I fully enjoyed; each of the separate stories converged in a slick, cohesive way. I’m happy to say the same for A Christmas Horror Story.
Let’s face it, fitting zombie elves, Krampus, an evil spirit, and changelings into one story is tough. This film manages to let every thread stand alone, while subtly stringing them all together. Eventually, these elements meet up for a funny, eerie finale. A Christmas Horror Story really does capture the Christmas spirit, and makes a great casserole out of what would otherwise be too many ingredients.
Santa’s Slay has been one of my favorites to watch on Christmas day for a few years now. Its absurd attitude and hilarious gore plop it right into that horror/comedy sweet spot. Have you ever wondered what happened to Bill Goldberg after his wrestling career? Turns out he’s busy being a buff bully of a Santa Claus.
Santa is the son of Satan, and he loses a curling match to an angel. His punishment was banishment, but now he’s back, and the son of the angel that beat him must stop Santa’s evil rampage. Ever wanted to see Goldberg light the Nanny (Fran Drescher) on fire? I already know that’s a “yes.”
Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2
Okay, this entry is purely self-indulgent. The acting is pitiful at best, and I don’t think I’ve seen the actors in any other roles. Most of the movie is actually stock footage from the original Silent Night, Deadly Night. So, no need to watch the first movie for any context; the parts that aren’t directly ripped from the prequel are centered on the original killer’s brother, who eventually goes on a murder spree of his own.
This is one of those movies that makes me laugh so hard my stomach hurts for days — for all the wrong reasons. If you’ve ever wondered where that famous “Garbage Day” scene comes from, the answer is right here. Get some beer and some buddies, and witness this amazing train wreck.
The VHS holographic cover was the first thing I noticed about this release; that gimmick was all 17-year-old me needed. This flick is intentionally cheesy and dumb, but sometimes that’s just what the doctor orders to get rid of the holiday blues.
A truck carrying genetic chemicals results in the death of a serial killer. As luck would have it, the accident happens in a snowstorm, turning him into a killer snowman! Low budget be damned, this movie is hilarious. Before CGI was affordable for straight-to-video movies, there were bad practical effects, and there are plenty on display here. Dump a handle of whiskey in that eggnog and laugh along.
Every 23 years on December 5th, there’s a full moon, and Saint Nick awakens from his graveyard slumber to terrorize Amsterdam. And he happens to have an undead barbarian horde at his command. It’s up to a student and a cop to stop the mayhem.
Much of this movie was lost in translation on me, but that may be because I watched the dubbed version. Regardless, it’s a cool Christmas film, and the undead burn victim makeup looks quite menacing. I have to hand it to the cinematographer too: the camera work really makes this movie. Highly recommended.
Article by contributor Dixter.