It’s Saint Patrick’s Day! Your local pub has dyed their cheapest beer a putrid green color, your favorite band has trotted out a cover of “Danny Boy,” and a few strands of your hair have turned an inexplicable shade of crimson. Celebrate the luck of the Irish with this list of the rarest Lucky Charms marshmallows, why don’t you?
The cereal has been around for over 50 years, and General Mills has updated its marshmallow roster more times than a leprechaun can count! Let’s take a look at some of my seminal cereal favorites from over the years.
50th ANNIVERSARY GREEN CLOVER MARSHMALLOWS
For their 50th anniversary in 2014, Lucky Charms released a limited version of their cereal featuring two different shades of green clover marshmallows. This turned the milk a shade of green even leprechauns would approve of. As Rachael Ray would say, “Yummo!”
DIAMOND MARSHMALLOWS OF THE DAMNED
In 1971, Shirley Bassey crooned out another hit James Bond single with “Diamonds Are Forever.” Just a few years later, General Mills trotted out diamond-shaped marshmallows in their cereal. Coincidence?
SWIRLED MOON (NOT OVER MY HAMMY) MARSHMALLOWS
Although moons have always been a mainstay of the Lucky Charms roster, General Mills added swirled moons to give things a 1970s retro kick in 2013. To misquote the late Roger Ebert’s screenplay to Beyond the Valley of the Dolls, these moons were my happening, and they freaked me out!
HALLOWEEN MARSHMALLOWS NOT RELATED TO THE TITULAR WARWICK DAVIS HORROR FLICKS
In a misguided attempt to cross-promote seasons, General Mills plopped out a limited edition of frosted Lucky Charms for Halloween 2010, but a dopey bat mask did little to reduce their mascot’s creep factor. A tie-in with the infamous Leprechaun horror flicks starring Warwick Davis would have worked wonders. Just think about it.
POT OF GOLD MARSHMALLOWS ARE THE BEST, I’M TOLD
When you think of leprechaun stereotypes, the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow is right near the top. That’s why it’s curious that it only appeared in limited runs of the cereals — you’d think this would be a regular ol’ marshmallow.
LGBT PRIDE PROGRESSIVE MARSHMALLOWS
To celebrate LGBT pride month in 2013, Lucky Charms had a few more rainbow marshmallows added to their roster. Magically delicious and progressively nutritious (hey, it has whole grain now, right?).
WHALE OF A TALE MARSHMALLOWS
Swirled-up whale marshmallows is such an odd concept that I couldn’t resist putting it at the top of this list. The commercial featured an embarrassed whale coated in a slop of random colors. If only he had kept his blowhole under control!
Article by contributor Mat-Bradley Tschirgi.