Think you know what’s going to happen tonight at SummerSlam? Prove it by testing your predictive mettle against Dave and make your mark on the next Cheap Popcast episode!
Hey all! If you haven’t heard the latest Cheap Popcast, I’m continuing the grand tradition of predicting the results of a pre-determined event! Last month, I got a mere 5-out-of-8 predictions correct, paling in comparison to H_E_N_E_R_E_Y_Gs_eviltwin, who got 7-out-of-8 victors right, including the single winners of the multi-man MITB match! He chose CM Punk’s original WWE theme, “This Fire Burns,” by Killswitch Engage… one of my favorite themes, to boot!
Wrestling fans like to think they’re in the know, and what better way to prove it than by testing your predictive mettle against me! Here’s how it goes. I’m going to make my predictions in this here article, and then open up the replies to you awesome listeners. You will then pick a winner (or in a rare case draw/double DQ) for each match (don’t worry about getting the finish right, I’m just looking for winners), and then, just in case there’s a tie for correct predictions, pick a running time for the final match listed (the presumed main event) as a tiebreaker. With Money in the Bank briefcases at play, I’m adding a new twist. If you predict a cash-in, and it doesn’t happen, you lose a point. If you get it right, however, you gain two! I think that should make things interesting. Or maybe I’ve scared everyone off from including a cash-in. We’ll see…
What does the winner get? Well, you can make your mark on the next Cheap Popcast episode by choosing the next show’s closing theme. Pick the wrestler theme and include a YouTube URL to a wrestler’s theme alongside your predictions and I’ll give you a shout-out before throwing to our episode-ender (sorry, Evil Hank, I’ll give you AND this winner a shout-out next time). Let’s kick off the predictions!
US TITLE MATCH: DEAN AMBROSE (CHAMP) VS ROB VAN DAM
RVD is part-time, and the US title (as great as Ambrose is as representing and defending it) is below him at this point. Some folks think this will be a shmozz to set up a tag title match later on. I hope not. Why waste the free show? Anywho, if you think that’ll happen and want to predict tag match results, knock yourself out, but I don’t count unnanounced matches in my tallies. Ambrose could use more build so I say Ambrose pins RVD.
NATALYA VS BRIE BELLA
Is Brie the one dating Daniel Bryan? I don’t care enough to look it up. That probably doesn’t even make her a face by proxy, but the Bellas are the stars of the Divas show while Natalya complains about her cat on the show. While that makes me cheer Nattie more, I still think she’s got a snowball’s chance in LA’s hellish heat. Brie pins Natalya.
CODY RHODES VS DAMIEN SANDOW
I know Rhodes is technically a face now, but I ain’t feelin’ it. He needs a true push to make that happen, and step one is Cody going over to get his revenge and move closer to main-eventing (on Smackdown). Rhodes pins Sandow.
MIXED TAG MATCH: DOLPH ZIGGLER AND KAITLYN VS. BIG E LANGSTON AND AJ LEE
This is the first time Langston and Ziggler are facing off in a PPV match, and while I was hoping it’d be a one-on-one contest, I can roll with this. Kaitlyn and AJ are heads and shoulders above the rest of the Divas, and a weird finish will allow Langston to pin Ziggler in a way that Ziggler can come back to get his win back next month or move back up the card. Langston and AJ win.
RING OF FIRE MATCH: KANE VS BRAY WYATT
After his crazy build, it makes no sense for Wyatt to lose his first match (in this gimmick). I also like the idea of Kane losing, taking some time off, and showing up with a crazy backwoods beard (read: not this kind) as a Wyatt family member to fight against Bryan again. Wyatt wins..
WWE HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH: ALBERTO DEL RIO (CHAMP) VS CHRISTIAN
Everything says that Christian SHOULDN’T win tonight. He’s went over ADR a number of times over the last month, and his brief 2011 runs make me think higher-ups don’t see him as main-event material. That’s sad, because Christian’s probably my favorite guy in the WWE right now. Heck, strictly for my fandom, I’m going to say Christian wins the title… but I’m also going to be realistic and say he suffers from another short reign as Sandow cashes in and wins the title.
CM PUNK VS BROCK LESNAR
This is a toughie. Lesnar’s, what, one win over .500 right now? He should probably go over. Yeah, Punk’s pretty bulletproof, and if Lesnar’s going to go onto bigger things for next year’s WrestleMania, he needs to be more dominant. Lesnar makes Punk tap.
WWE TITLE MATCH: JOHN CENA (CHAMP) VS DANIEL BRYAN
Given his popularity, there’s nobody on the roster as red-hot as Daniel Bryan. He’s almost as over as Punk was two years ago. Of course, WWE fumbled that one for awhile, and the presence of Triple H in the match as he was back then is worrisome too, but I’m putting faith in the WWE to put the best wrestler in the top spot for the first time in awhile. Bryan pins Cena to win the title in a 24:30 match.
Alright, there’s my picks. Sound off below with your match predictions, (including the Cena-Bryan running time) as well as a YouTube link to your wrestler theme pick. Good luck, everyone!