The Best New Amazon Releases: 50 Shades of WrestleMania 33

A week devoid of new retail-release games is made up for with a mix of Blu-rays featuring erotica, sports, and classic mafia movies!

Look, not every week is a winner. While you can expect some great stuff on Laser Time this week, including a Laser Time about strange superhero teams, a Pirate-themed Fantasy Fight, Back to the Future III as this week’s Monday Night Movie, the return of our Marvel Trading Card series and streams galore! Over on Amazon… eh. We’re without major new game releases after the one-two punch of Mario Kart 8 Deluxe and Prey over the last two Fridays, so this week has a few digital games but the real headliners this week are an eclectic batch of Blu-rays. Even though we’ve collected some great games and movies you don’t have to buy any of these products to help Laser Time. Simply buy anything on Amazon after clicking one of these links and you’ll help out LT. Anywho, now onto this week’s best new stuff!

PlayStation Network Gift Card for LocoRoco Remastered, NBA Playgrounds, and Strafe
While this is a week devoid of new physical releases, you can still help out Laser Time a ton by buying your digital currency of choice through our links, as we actually get more of a cut from those purchases than new retail games. And this is a week with some sweet new downloads! Over on the PlayStation 4, there’s the remastered version of Sony’s cutest mascots with Locoroco Remastered, the revival of arcade basketball with NBA Playgrounds, and fast-paced Quake-like randomly-generated first-person shooting via Strafe. Given how got-dang different each of the games are, there’s a fair chance at least one fits in your wheelhouse, or if you’re like us, a little bit of each game might appeal to you. Anywho, before big-ass retail releases recommence next week with Injustice 2, take some time out to check out one of these smaller release.

Fifty Shades Darker
Welp, here we have the biggest NEW Blu-ray release of the week. If you want to see a very attractive couple engage in some mildly kinky softcore sex, you’re all set with Fifty Shades Darker, which continues the adventures of sexman and sexwoman. Anywho, this is an adaptation of the second of three Fifty Shades novels (initially conceived as Twilight fan fiction), so you can expect the final book to be turned into TWO movies (as per movie-making tradition) and the entire saga to end with a huge orgasm or something. Anywho, moving on!

The Godfather
Something tells me the Fifty Shades Trilogy won’t have the cache in 2050 that The Godfather franchise has some 45 years after its debut. Francis Ford Coppola’s mobster epic is celebrating a big milestone this year, making it the perfect time to re-release the first two classic films on Blu-ray (The Godfather Part III is also getting a re-release but lets skip that one). Even though the fiftieth anniversary is just five years away, who knows how popular Blu-rays will be come 2022. Anywho, The Godfather is wonderfully acted, scored, and shot; showcasing Al Pacino’s mild-manneredness years before Scent of a Woman would turn Al into a giant screaming cartoon. The Godfather Part II tells wonderfully parallel stories of Michael Corleone (Pacino)’s struggle as the lead of the crime family while also showcasing his father Vito’s rise to power (also perfectly encapsulated by Robert De Niro). They’re both epics in every sense of the word and if you ever wanted to collect the two highly regarded chapters of The Godfather saga without the useless triloy-capper, then these Blu-rays are an offer you can’t refuse.

Chicago Cubs: 2016 World Series: The Complete Game 7
Normally, I’d call the release of a single baseball game on Blu-ray a bit excessive — heck, as a Mets fan I wouldn’t even buy Game Six on Blu-ray all its own. However, last year’s World Series was a different matter altogether. The Chicago Cubs battled back from a 3-1 series defecit to force a winner-takes-all Game 7 featuring two teams with generations of championship futility between them. In the end, the Cubs broke their curse of over a hundred years while the Indians continued their drought into their 69th year (haha, the weed number). Anywho, if you’re a Cubs fan, you’ve already probably had this on pre-order for months, but while you’re at it, can you send some of that good baseball juju the Mets way?

WrestleMania 33
Now here’s some sports I’m ALWAYS up for celebrating. Sure, WrestleMania is becoming a bit of a slog every year, with the card routinely running upwards of SEVEN HOURS in recent years, but you can’t deny the spectacle of WWE’s biggest show. Between the amazing set, the returning legends, and the much-anticipated matches, WrestleMania is guaranteed to deliver some of the most-talked about wrestling moments of every year. With the exception of one or two dragging matches, ‘Mania 33 still delivered with some great surprises (The Hardys returning!), fantastic matches (the perfect blowoff to Brock Lesnar and Goldberg’s rivalry), and the end of one of WrestleMania’s biggest stories as The Undertaker’s 27-year career came to a close with a main-event loss at the show synonymous with the deadman. Even though you can watch the show at any time with the WWE Network, if you want to save the show in a physical format, this Blu-ray is the best bet.



Kingdom Hearts III
Red Dead Redemption 2
South Park: The Fractured But Whole
Death Stranding
Final Fantasy VII Remake

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